Imaginary Lovers; Imaginary Enemies
"I can’t believe you would barge in like that. We were in the middle of-" "What?! I live here!" "Shhh. Keep your voice down. He is still...
Those Two Impostors
"Don't get blood on the car seat, okay? Stay on the towel." "Thanks for the sympathy." "Oh, poor Bobby. Is that what you want? Sympathy?"...
Telemarketer
“Hello, is this the lady of the house?” “No, this is Tammie.” “Is your mommy or daddy home?” “Mommy is.” “Can you go get her?” “No, she’s...
Gas Posthaste
“Welcome to Gas Posthaste. Please swipe your card.” — “Will this be debit or credit?” “Debit.“ “Select grade.” “87.“ “Would you like a...
Returns
"This is the returns department?" "That's what it says on the sign on the wall behind me, so I guess that's what it is." "Well then, I...
You Gotta Have Faith
“Say that again, Jim.” “That way we’ll know the kind of person we’re hiring.’” “Are you sure you’ll know?” “Certainly. You don’t have to...